Bringing Up Children: Making The Right Choices.
by Anna Tham (The Sun)
I HAD a casual chat with the father of my daughter’s classmate one day and learned that like most families, both he and his wife work and leave their children in the care of maids.
Due to the many horror stories about foreign maids abusing children, they had equipped their house with cameras to monitor the home while they are at work.
This scenario is very common in Malaysian homes. Gone are the days when the father is the sole breadwinner while the mother stays home to tend to the family’s needs.
Children’s needs then were far more basic. They went to school, came home, and did their homework. They played with the neighbours’ children with hardly any threat of being kidnapped, raped or murdered.
At least, that was the childhood I remember having.
Children these days, especially those living in the city, have their schedules packed to the brim with tuition classes for every subject, extra-curricular activities and enrichment classes like languages, music, mental arithmetic, tennis, golf, gymnastics, art, dance, yoga – and the list goes on.
These classes are good for their overall development provided they are interested in them and if it is required to help them keep up with lessons.
But how much is enough for a child to grow without being too stressed?
With all these activities going on in the life of the modern-day child, who would be responsible for ensuring that he gets where he needs to go safely, and that he is properly guided at home where revision of lessons is concerned?
Both parents are at work literally from dawn to dusk and probably have just enough time to have dinner with them and kiss them goodnight.
Some families have grandparents who are able to help out but not everyone is that fortunate. They have no choice but to leave their children in the care of strangers like maids, drivers, and day-care minders.
My daughter has been blessed the past few years with having me at her disposal 24/7, so to speak. I am around to care for her at home and drive her to and from school and all her extra-curricular enrichment activities.
It was a matter of what is more important to us when we considered giving up a dual-income lifestyle. This is a crossroad all couples face once they have children.
One option, which is becoming more popular, is for one parent, or even both, to work from home, by owning a business, freelancing, offering niche services or taking on flexible or part-time jobs.
Whatever the choice, there will be sacrifices to be made and rewards to be reaped. It is a matter of knowing what suits your family best and what makes all of you happiest.
After all, we only have one lifetime and we must make the most of it.
My first son, Isaiah, is going to start kindergarden school early next year... (o oh..!)
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